About Me

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North Carolina, United States
I'm a 36yr old, wife, wannabe mom, horticulturalist, halfass knitter, and sometimes runner, searching for my grace

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

First Scan

My scan went well yesterday. I am measuring 6wks 4 days and the heart beat 117bpm. I am terrified.

My RE decided they were just going to release me yesterday, which left me with no plan for the next ultrasound. This is a spontaneous pregnancy to them and I think that makes me less important as far as they are concerned. My RE doctor was not there yesterday either and I had some new guy who didn't know shit about me or my history. He was trying to talk to me about what I should eat and stuff during early pregnancy. I said to him this is my 7th pregnancy I know the deal.

I explained that I needed (yes I need them) weekly ultrasounds for the next 4 weeks, b/c of my history. They didn't seem to care and said talk to your OB about it.

The thing is I don't have an OB yet. I fired my last one, and I haven't got a new one yet. I don't want to either until I make it past the scary part. I do have an MFM and thank GOD for her. I left a hysterical message with her yesterday and she called me back around 6:30 last night. She said she couldn't tell if I was really happy or really scared. I told her I am scared to death. I need a plan, and the RE made me leave without a plan. She said not to worry she would monitor me weekly, and scheduled ultrasounds for the next two weeks. I am so blessed to have her, and she hopefully doesn't think me too crazy. I don't care if she does as long as I can have the weekly scans. Only six more days until the next one.

This part is pure hell or maybe it's more like purgatory because there is that shred of hope that it will be ok. I am trying desperately to focus on work and getting through each day.

5 comments:

Panamahat said...

Great news! Hang in there, one day at a time.

Dan & Hillary said...

I think any good OB will let you come in weekly. I had u/s's every 10 days until the 8wk mark, then every two weeks until 14wks. The u/s's don't cost them a penny since the machines are in-office. Hope you find someone to take you seriously!! Yeah for the great heartbeat!!

Grad3 said...

I am so thrilled and scared with you. Seriously. I know. I get it.

Hang tight- it's hard when you already feel the hope and excitement pulling on your heartstrings.

You can do this. I know it. I will be here every week waiting to hear about each scan... ~Huge, Supportive, Calming Hugs~

Monica said...

Gak! Hang in there - fingers crossed and hopes high. I can totally get this kind of fear. (hugs)

Stacey said...

This is fantastic news, but I don't mean to sound as though you're crazy for being scared. I know that after so many losses it's hard to let your guard down. The first few weeks are tough.

I'm praying for peace for you.