About Me

My photo
North Carolina, United States
I'm a 36yr old, wife, wannabe mom, horticulturalist, halfass knitter, and sometimes runner, searching for my grace

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Beta # 2

After calling my RE office 4 times, I found out the hospital didn't fax my results over, So one quick call to the lab and the results are in

Beta #2: 631 at 18 dpo

Today I go to my MFM to learn how to give myself the lovenox injections. I have an appointment for my first ultrasound July 13.

It has almost been a full year since my last miscarriage. I thought I would be better prepared this go around, not so much.. I have sudden surges of anxiety where I feel like I might burst into tears and then it passes. I hate this waiting to find out if it's viable or not. I cannot bear to see another empty sac, and then if there is a heartbeat, there is a whole other set of fears. Sometimes I wish I could be knocked out and hooked up to an IV for the next 3 weeks. I'm a little scared of the lovenox injections. Just the needles and bruising. I tried to watch a video on how to do it and I almost threw up.


Meg said...

I can relate to this post so much. I got pregnant right about a year after my last miscarriage and the waiting, giving up control and sheer huge amount of hope all mixed together was really hard to get through....

All I was able to do was thank the universe each night I was still pregnant and hope each morning for another healthy day.

You have incredible numbers and I am holding so much hope for you!

Dan & Hillary and little Russell said...

Check out this link to type in your hcg's... your #'s look great!!


PS- put a cold ice pack on your belly for 15minutes before injecting. If you don't, you'll bruise badly and you'll feel the burn:-( It really gets routine:-)

Grad3 said...

That is a fantastic beta- seriously fantastic!

I have been burned by numbers before so I know how hard it is to trust them, just try to keep faith. Or grab the chocolate bar next to you, whatever is easiest ;)

I do the Lovenox too- not gonna lie it stings but you'll get used too it. Thee bruising... sometimes bad sometimes not but!! You can do this... ~Big Hugs~

Stacey said...

Praying for you in these next few weeks. I know those early waiting days are so miserable when you have a history of loss. ((HUGS))

I'm with Hillary - the ice really does help with the pain, but I did still have a nasty bruise.

Thinking of you.

Grad3 said...

Wow, in my last comment I sounded like I was drunk! (yikes...)

Wanted to say, I know what you mean about not wanting to see an empty sac. I won't look at the screen until there is a hb and try to not figure out the EDD until 10ish weeks. Don't be afraid to tell them what you want- you aren't a typical patient!

Hang in there and I am waiting with you until the 13th! Hope you are feeling like crap :)