About Me

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North Carolina, United States
I'm a 36yr old, wife, wannabe mom, horticulturalist, halfass knitter, and sometimes runner, searching for my grace

Thursday, August 28, 2008


My retreat in the mountains was truly a healing experience for me. I truly felt the presence of God and some peace in my heart. Trying to get that feeling back is a little more difficult, but I am working on it. My husband is having a hard time with my brother and SIL pregnancy. Surprising to me that it is him and not me having these feelings. He is so angry at our situation, and I don't have any words to make it better. Infertility is a difficult topic I think for most men to discuss. So he chooses not to discuss it all. Bottled up feelings come out in unexpected situations focused in strange directions. The fact of the matter is people we love and know will have babies whether we like it or not. So we must find a healthy way to deal with it and be happy. I have been gathering information about adoption just to learn more about what is involved. Meanwhile, I finished my first cycle of BCP and I didn't really have a period, just more spotting like I had been for the previous six weeks. At least the spotting finally stopped when I started the next cycle of pills.


admin said...

Super glad to see your post today. Just pleased that the retreat gave you some relief.

I am sorry to hear DH is struggling. I find my hub and I take turns in those moments. So perhaps while you take a breath and refocus, he has had a chance to digest all of the trauma you have been through.

Thinking about you and wishing you the very best.

Meg said...

So glad to see you back and somewhat refreshed! Love the new look of th blog too.

Have you ever read Coming to Terms by Cohen? Is is a quick and great read and both myself and my husband read it. It is written by a man whose wife had multiple miscarriages so the spin on it was great for my husband.

It was such an empowering book for him to read and get more comfortable with the whole IF/loss experience and we had some great conversations surrounding some of the topics in the book. I think maybe it would be a good thing for you to read and share.

It is so hard to get them to be okay with being emotional and open about their inner worlds, isn't it?